Sgt Hartman

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Sgt Hartman last won the day on February 6

Sgt Hartman had the most liked content!

About Sgt Hartman

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  1. I think there should be more public bogs in general and I mean proper half-decent toilets, not the shit-splattered smackhead storage facilities that pass for them at the moment. I was caught short in Oxford years ago and literally could not find anywhere to take a piss. It was ridiculous. Eventually my bladder hit defcon 5 and I had to piss behind a hedge in Norham Gardens. Would'nt you know it, two young women spotted me and gave me an earful about not waiting until I got home. I asked them whether they honestly thought I would be pissing behind a hedge unless I truly had to and if they could point me to the nearest public convenience for future reference I'd be most grateful. They could not and buggered off in a flurry of tuts and 'men!' Tossers.
  2. Well I'm so pleased that such a study has been conducted. I mean it's not like there was any better way to spend the money was there? I look forward to fuck all changes in workplace conditions as a result.
  3. It's probably credit to them that nobody did. It's Texas and I think it's considered socially unacceptable not to have a gun.
  4. I can smell the moonshine and incest fron here.
  5. Frankly if they weren't looking for problems then they shouldn't have offered the position to Mrs Doubtfire in the first place.
  6. WTF. Irvine Welsh reads that post and immediately thinks 'well that must be true!' before calling for boycotts? Do these people not engage brain? Sorry but on face-value that tweet sounds like complete bollocks to me. It may be true but I'd like to hear the other side of the story before pushing the boycott button. I wish, more than just about anything, that Jack Dorsey would wake up one morning and think 'what the fuck have I done?' He would then go on to send a last tweet to the world saying 'sorry, we tried but this really hasn't worked out. You're simply not ready for this,' before shutting down Twitter and deleting it permanently. I think they'd give him a Nobel prize.
  7. Small gardening business here. Knackering but it pays the mortgage. Another bonus is the only dickhead I have to tolerate is the person who's just written this sentence. Edit - and buggered up the quote.
  8. Children's football tournaments. I moaned extensively about this on another thread but this one is probably it's rightful home. I won't get quite as vocal as I did there but after the behaviour I saw during an under 7's kick-about, it will be a cold day in hell before I get myself or my kid involved in anything like that again. I have genuinely never witnessed such a disgraceful bunch of arseholes in all of my puff and it's completely validated my opinion that the game of football has been ruined by complete fuckwits. And before it's asked, yes I've been to loads of other sporting tournaments with Hartman Jr. but I've never encountered behaviour even remotely approaching what I saw on Saturday at any of them. None.
  9. A company has to go some way to piss me off enough that I'll deliberately avoid their wares. That said Gillete can fuck right off as I found their advert so egregious that I've no longer got any interest in their product or giving them my hard earned. Also: Twitter - The cyber-sewer that runs under humanity. The Guardian - For obvious reasons. BBC - See above.
  10. Got to wonder how this passed muster as a good idea. "Hey Enrique, I've sorted the prizes for the womens squash tournament." "Watch'a got?" "Some toiletries, a callus remover and a twelve inch plastic cock." "Did you say a plastic cock?" "Hell yeah!" "Meh. Fine. What could go wrong?"
  11. The more I look at him the more I'm amazed he sacrificed his milkshake. He looks like a man who takes his milkshakes very seriously indeed. He must be very cross.
  12. Jesus Christ. I'm no fan of Farage but he's clearly no fascist...let's hit him with a brick anyway! Fucking straight up incitement from some hipster brewery who make the sort of beer much loved by fat, unkempt SJW milkshake-throwers.
  13. Got to be said, he really just looks exactly how you'd expect, doesn't he? Big fat slovenly bastard.
  14. I kept expecting Tyrion to get an bolt out of nowhere from Bron's crossbow as that had been left hanging a few episodes back. Was surprised to see him just take a seat at the table at the end. I did like his brothel quip though. Anyway, clearly Drogon knew what was coming as he turned the Iron Throne into a ramp.