Horrified Onlooker

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  1. Upvote
    Horrified Onlooker got a reaction from spunko in Things you wish you didn't know.   
    Thanks Spunko! I will be giving lunch a miss today!
  2. Upvote
    Horrified Onlooker got a reaction from spunko in Things you wish you didn't know.   
    Thanks Spunko! I will be giving lunch a miss today!
  3. Like
    Horrified Onlooker got a reaction from Admiral Pepe in 5g and Bristol University suicides   
    I tried to inject air into my veins in year 3 of Uni. Living with friends, I had never been lonelier and couldn’t share what I was thinking. The feeling when I woke up was dreadful. Failure to top yourself is the ultimate in failure! It took 2 years to work through it. 
    Never underestimate the effect of isolation. 
    I have never shared this before now, despite having served with some relatively special parts of the military with screening processes in place.
     
    BTW 1g didn’t exist then!
  4. Like
    Horrified Onlooker got a reaction from Admiral Pepe in 5g and Bristol University suicides   
    I tried to inject air into my veins in year 3 of Uni. Living with friends, I had never been lonelier and couldn’t share what I was thinking. The feeling when I woke up was dreadful. Failure to top yourself is the ultimate in failure! It took 2 years to work through it. 
    Never underestimate the effect of isolation. 
    I have never shared this before now, despite having served with some relatively special parts of the military with screening processes in place.
     
    BTW 1g didn’t exist then!
  5. Like
    Horrified Onlooker got a reaction from Admiral Pepe in 5g and Bristol University suicides   
    I tried to inject air into my veins in year 3 of Uni. Living with friends, I had never been lonelier and couldn’t share what I was thinking. The feeling when I woke up was dreadful. Failure to top yourself is the ultimate in failure! It took 2 years to work through it. 
    Never underestimate the effect of isolation. 
    I have never shared this before now, despite having served with some relatively special parts of the military with screening processes in place.
     
    BTW 1g didn’t exist then!
  6. Like
    Horrified Onlooker got a reaction from Admiral Pepe in 5g and Bristol University suicides   
    I tried to inject air into my veins in year 3 of Uni. Living with friends, I had never been lonelier and couldn’t share what I was thinking. The feeling when I woke up was dreadful. Failure to top yourself is the ultimate in failure! It took 2 years to work through it. 
    Never underestimate the effect of isolation. 
    I have never shared this before now, despite having served with some relatively special parts of the military with screening processes in place.
     
    BTW 1g didn’t exist then!
  7. Like
    Horrified Onlooker got a reaction from Admiral Pepe in 5g and Bristol University suicides   
    I tried to inject air into my veins in year 3 of Uni. Living with friends, I had never been lonelier and couldn’t share what I was thinking. The feeling when I woke up was dreadful. Failure to top yourself is the ultimate in failure! It took 2 years to work through it. 
    Never underestimate the effect of isolation. 
    I have never shared this before now, despite having served with some relatively special parts of the military with screening processes in place.
     
    BTW 1g didn’t exist then!
  8. Like
    Horrified Onlooker got a reaction from Admiral Pepe in 5g and Bristol University suicides   
    I tried to inject air into my veins in year 3 of Uni. Living with friends, I had never been lonelier and couldn’t share what I was thinking. The feeling when I woke up was dreadful. Failure to top yourself is the ultimate in failure! It took 2 years to work through it. 
    Never underestimate the effect of isolation. 
    I have never shared this before now, despite having served with some relatively special parts of the military with screening processes in place.
     
    BTW 1g didn’t exist then!
  9. Like
    Horrified Onlooker got a reaction from Admiral Pepe in 5g and Bristol University suicides   
    I tried to inject air into my veins in year 3 of Uni. Living with friends, I had never been lonelier and couldn’t share what I was thinking. The feeling when I woke up was dreadful. Failure to top yourself is the ultimate in failure! It took 2 years to work through it. 
    Never underestimate the effect of isolation. 
    I have never shared this before now, despite having served with some relatively special parts of the military with screening processes in place.
     
    BTW 1g didn’t exist then!
  10. Upvote
    Horrified Onlooker got a reaction from Carl Fimble in Waitrose Rename a Sandwich Because It's Sexist   
    More fuckwittery on an epic scale...
     
    https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2018/10/17/kleenex-ditch-mansize-tissues-gender-inequality-complaints/
  11. Upvote
    Horrified Onlooker got a reaction from One percent in The Germany is fucked thread   
    I have a 14 year old daughter and I am terrified of the world she is growing up in. We bang on here about obesity and young women, but where would you let your teenage kids walk these days?
  12. Upvote
    Horrified Onlooker got a reaction from ILikeCake in Deluded Old Scrapper Birds On Dating Sites   
    Young Grasshopper may be ready to leave the temple...
  13. Upvote
    Horrified Onlooker got a reaction from One percent in The Germany is fucked thread   
    I have a 14 year old daughter and I am terrified of the world she is growing up in. We bang on here about obesity and young women, but where would you let your teenage kids walk these days?
  14. Like
    Horrified Onlooker reacted to Carl Fimble in No beer tomorrow   
    Over my dead body, and the bodies of many others.
    This is our country and they can get themselves right away to fuck if they think they can have it.
  15. Upvote
    Horrified Onlooker got a reaction from One percent in The Germany is fucked thread   
    I have a 14 year old daughter and I am terrified of the world she is growing up in. We bang on here about obesity and young women, but where would you let your teenage kids walk these days?
  16. Upvote
    Horrified Onlooker got a reaction from ILikeCake in Deluded Old Scrapper Birds On Dating Sites   
    Young Grasshopper may be ready to leave the temple...
  17. Upvote
    Horrified Onlooker got a reaction from One percent in The Germany is fucked thread   
    I have a 14 year old daughter and I am terrified of the world she is growing up in. We bang on here about obesity and young women, but where would you let your teenage kids walk these days?
  18. Upvote
    Horrified Onlooker got a reaction from ILikeCake in Deluded Old Scrapper Birds On Dating Sites   
    Young Grasshopper may be ready to leave the temple...
  19. Upvote
    Horrified Onlooker got a reaction from ILikeCake in Deluded Old Scrapper Birds On Dating Sites   
    Young Grasshopper may be ready to leave the temple...
  20. Upvote
    Horrified Onlooker got a reaction from One percent in The Germany is fucked thread   
    I have a 14 year old daughter and I am terrified of the world she is growing up in. We bang on here about obesity and young women, but where would you let your teenage kids walk these days?
  21. Upvote
    Horrified Onlooker got a reaction from ILikeCake in Deluded Old Scrapper Birds On Dating Sites   
    Young Grasshopper may be ready to leave the temple...
  22. Upvote
    Horrified Onlooker got a reaction from ILikeCake in Deluded Old Scrapper Birds On Dating Sites   
    Young Grasshopper may be ready to leave the temple...
  23. Upvote
    Horrified Onlooker got a reaction from ILikeCake in Deluded Old Scrapper Birds On Dating Sites   
    Young Grasshopper may be ready to leave the temple...
  24. Upvote
    Horrified Onlooker got a reaction from ILikeCake in Deluded Old Scrapper Birds On Dating Sites   
    Young Grasshopper may be ready to leave the temple...
  25. Like
    Horrified Onlooker reacted to JoeDavola in Deluded Old Scrapper Birds On Dating Sites   
    So...
    I tidied the flat. Stocked up on johnnies, wine, ect...
    Invited her over to the flat before we headed out, but she suggested just meeting outside the apartment block. Fair enough, I wasn't going to beg her to come up.
    Beautiful day in Belfast today; we ended up spending over 3 hours walking a loop of the most picturesque parts of the city along the water's edge, beautiful weather ect... Was kind of like the best first date ever, minus the lack of sex (which I actually don't mind). Conversation flowed really easily as we have a ton in common, far more than I'd actually thought as I'd never spent more than say 10 minutes with her before. Ran into a mate of mine at one point which was nice as proof that....ya know....I actually have mates. 
    She casually mentioned, in a not terribly enthusiastic tone, about being 'with' someone toward the end of the meeting, and mentioned something regarding that. I just ignored it and kept talking about what we'd been talking about. As we approached my flat at the end she was saying that she had to go back to her place for dinner blah blah. I invited her up anyway and she declined. I know I'll get mocked for this, but I didn't kiss her, based on the reception to touch earlier in the meeting and the general vibe. I told her I'd had a good time and gave her what was hopefully a non-beta casual hug, i.e. a hand around her waist/lower back, pulling her in ect. No hoverhand. As I said, I know people say I should have gone for the kiss but it really didn't seem the vibe for that.
    I actually feel great now. She is exactly the kind of person I'd like to date; she's exactly the kind of person I'd like as a long term relationship. But here's the thing; I won't be contacting her again. She seems effectively unavailable. And I think there's a good chance she doesn't fancy me, even though we had a great time. And this is the good thing that I've learned about myself compared to say 5 years ago; I've become red-pilled enough that I won't be falling into a state of Limerence and pining after her. I seem to have lost the 'oneitis' gene, which is a massive thing for me. What I certainly won't be doing is being the brainy beta that she has interesting conversations with before and after she's being screwed by the big alpha rugby player boyfriend (they are the embodiment of Joe Jackson's "pretty woman walking with gorillas down my street" lyric). I'm making myself scarce again, getting on with life, and if she enjoyed the time with me enough that she wants more it'll be as a dating relationship. Maybe she'll be single again in a few months and we can resume things then, who knows. I can't choose whether she's attracted to me or not, but I can choose not to invest time as a frustrating 'friendzone' type relationship that just ends up breeding contempt both for myself and her.
    Here's the odd thing that I'd never have guessed before this - the most prevailing feeling after this is a desire to start dating other women, as opposed to chasing after this one. Like several at once if need be. I think it's restored my mojo a bit after years of not going anywhere near a woman. This has been a good thing for me. And my flat's tidy.