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Sugarlips

The art of contentment

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@Tdog made a very good point on another thread that once our accommodation is paid for/off we should learn to be content with what we have and focus on living now. Pertinent whilst watching the madness of crowds at shopping centres today.

so for those who have achieved it, what are your secrets to fulfillment?

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Mostly attitude..

You can find the good or bad in anything.

I do 9-5 for a corporate,  but on the whole I enjoy it, I work with good people,  have a nice family and can afford most things I need in life. 

I can moan about the traffic, I can moan about corporate politics and petty jobsworths, moan about customers and moan about not having time for myself from the family..  but everything in life is a compromise.

If I was rich with no job I’d be bored without purpose. If I had no family I might be lonely or depressed.  There’s a lot to be said for making the most of what you’ve got but always looking out for and taking new opportunities.

You will do foolish things, but do them with enthusiasm.

-

Sidonie Gabrielle Colette

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3 hours ago, Sugarlips said:

@Tdog made a very good point on another thread that once our accommodation is paid for/off we should learn to be content with what we have and focus on living now. Pertinent whilst watching the madness of crowds at shopping centres today.

so for those who have achieved it, what are your secrets to fulfillment?

In theory other than tidy up some loose ends ie decorating a couple of bedrooms and pay 2 k off a boiler I’ve actualy done what I set out to achieve 8-9 years ago .ok not to the level that you guys have done and my income would be far less but it’s been done mainly on minimum wage and on my own I’d say working one night a week should I wish it ,is basicly retired . However I cannot see how I could reach forfillment I would end up an alcoholic 

Edited by stokiescum

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4 minutes ago, stokiescum said:

In theory other than tidy up some loose ends ie decorating a couple of bedrooms and pay 2 k off a boiler I’ve actualy done what I set out to achieve 8-9 years ago .ok not to the level that you guys have done and my income would be far less but it’s been done mainly on minimum wage and on my own I’d say working one night a week should I wish it ,is basicly retired . However I cannot see how I could reach forfillment I would end up an alcoholic 

Indeed financial independence is one thing, and a massive achievement in itself. living a full, active, happy life and still having some sort of purpose is quite another, and of course everyone is on their own journey so will get enjoyment from different things.

Certainly taking the work-life blinkers off and walking away from the brainwashed norm is step 1..

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9 minutes ago, Sugarlips said:

Indeed financial independence is one thing, and a massive achievement in itself. living a full, active, happy life and still having some sort of purpose is quite another, and of course everyone is on their own journey so will get enjoyment from different things.

Certainly taking the work-life blinkers off and walking away from the brainwashed norm is step 1..

Another problem is my job is not like a real job I spend most of the night fucking about on my phone

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55 minutes ago, stokiescum said:

In theory other than tidy up some loose ends ie decorating a couple of bedrooms and pay 2 k off a boiler I’ve actualy done what I set out to achieve 8-9 years ago .ok not to the level that you guys have done and my income would be far less but it’s been done mainly on minimum wage and on my own I’d say working one night a week should I wish it ,is basicly retired . However I cannot see how I could reach forfillment I would end up an alcoholic 

Same here if I didn't have a job I'd just be in Wetherspoons 

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A thread like this needs Maslow's pyramid:

Maslows_hierarchy_of_needs.svg_.png 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maslow's_hierarchy_of_needs

 

1 hour ago, stokiescum said:

Another problem is my job is not like a real job I spend most of the night fucking about on my phone

The esteem that dosboders have for you must be positive, but phones don't help with self-actualisation. Sounds like you'd have enough time to e.g. also do an OU course in anything that interests you?

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14 minutes ago, HighYield said:

A thread like this needs Maslow's pyramid:

Maslows_hierarchy_of_needs.svg_.png 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maslow's_hierarchy_of_needs

 

The esteem that dosboders have for you must be positive, but phones don't help with self-actualisation. Sounds like you'd have enough time to e.g. also do an OU course in anything that interests you?

The biggest problem I’ve got is an x that can have a phycosis and get sectioned literally at the drop of a hat makes geting a bigger house ie debt far more risky for me on my own than most people I have to remove my 5 year old from that environment imedietly for obviese reasons and take time off work so even though we ain’t together in the normal sense she has potentially a huge amount of control over me abiet not intentionally 

Edited by stokiescum

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30 minutes ago, HighYield said:

A thread like this needs Maslow's pyramid:

Maslows_hierarchy_of_needs.svg_.png 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maslow's_hierarchy_of_needs

 

The esteem that dosboders have for you must be positive, but phones don't help with self-actualisation. Sounds like you'd have enough time to e.g. also do an OU course in anything that interests you?

Nothing needs that bollox. 

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46 minutes ago, stokiescum said:

I’m at my happiest with a beer in my hand haveing my cock sucked and watching a decent horror or sci fi film 

I’m sure every MEME from 2000 onwards insists that there needs to be a bacon sandwich in there somewhere.. 

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1 minute ago, spygirl said:

Hi,

Prince Andrew here.

Maybe one of you can help me with a slight pickle I find myself in ...

 

You need to keep a low profile for a while.. go find a friendly stranger to invite you to their spy camera riddled love island full of inexplicably accommodating nubile young ladies for a few months.

You’re welcome.

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I'm early thirties, and have been very fortunate or lucky, depending on how you look at it, that I've been in a position to pay off my mortgage in full for a few years. I've been overpaying but have not paid off the entire thing, which i know will sound crazy (sorry Frank!), but I'm worried it'll remove my drive to get up in the morning. I've never not had money worries , as I grew up poor. I think it also keeps me grounded. 

Anyway the point being I'm not sure that contentment comes from being able to be mortgage free, it hasn't for me. Making peace with yourself and finding time to pursue your interests into adulthood , and not simply working to live, have all been ten times more important. 

Edited by spunko

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1 hour ago, HighYield said:

The esteem that dosboders have for you must be positive, but phones don't help with self-actualisation. Sounds like you'd have enough time to e.g. also do an OU course in anything that interests you?

The trouble with the OU now is that you have comporable fees to traditional on campus costs. I did some Physics and Astronomy modules in the early naughties purely for leisure when I treated myself to a decent telescope and they were a few hundred quid a pop for two 60 credit units (full time year equivalent). It's thousands now.

For distance learning I was impressed with the quality and content of the courses and materials and thought they were incredible value for money.

Some of the MOOC stuff that is about is interesting, and is better than nothing but I haven't seen much that is seriously academically inclined, seems a bit dumbed down in most cases, although to be fair I haven't explored in depth.

 

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22 minutes ago, Libspero said:

You need to keep a low profile for a while.. go find a friendly stranger to invite you to their spy camera riddled love island full of inexplicably accommodating nubile young ladies for a few months.

You’re welcome.

He likes his whisky like he likes his girls 15 years old and full of coke

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8 hours ago, Sugarlips said:

@Tdog made a very good point on another thread that once our accommodation is paid for/off we should learn to be content with what we have and focus on living now. Pertinent whilst watching the madness of crowds at shopping centres today.

so for those who have achieved it, what are your secrets to fulfillment?

Ive not achieved it or come anywhere close, have people in my life i have to deal with who are just out right devious and nasty cunts. 

In 8 years when i dont have to deal this anymore, have a house in England, possibly one in the sun all paid for .... and a couple of hundred k in my pension plus having just a couple of years work ahead of me then it'll be as close to content as i'll get.

Now only have to do 50/60 days a year which makes life easier and definitely leads one closer to contentment,  as i'm not the best at putting up with people who see themselves as managements crap. 

Not being materialistic and shaking ones head at those that are certainly leads to contentment as it avoids caring what others think and being in debt. 

There was a guy about 80 who had sailed the world for 30 years with his wife, having gave up his high flying job in the city several decades ago .... he said when working he was always ill and had very bad asthma ... but once he gave it all up and set sail they all cleared and he never used an inhaler again. Speaks volumes about modern life.

 

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