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Stuey

Pubs in December

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Just tried to visit my usuals in Stockton. 

Golden Smog - Christmas jumper twats playing some sort of card which required 'when red Indians first saw a white person they said...'. Tried to ignore the smell from real ale twats. 

Top of the Hops - Decent people.

Hope and Union - had to wait 45 minutes for a parmo amidst shrieking from dosbods. 

8pm snooker

This time of the year is shit for those who like a pub as it should be. Bring on January 

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Years ago I used to have a very small local, populated by a couple of dozen usual suspects tops - it was run as a co-operative for the village.

First Wednesday before Christmas, first drink is free - an annual thing.

Every year. Rammed. Totally. 100+ easily. Couldn't get to the bar. Never supported it any other time of the year.

Appeared to be a reasonably afluent place. I don't know if every single one of them was interest only mortgage, 20k holidays and kitchens on the credit cards and cars on PCP, but it wasn''t far off. Tossers to a man and a woman.

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29 minutes ago, Stuey said:

Just tried to visit my usuals in Stockton. 

Golden Smog - Christmas jumper twats playing some sort of card which required 'when red Indians first saw a white person they said...'. Tried to ignore the smell from real ale twats. 

Top of the Hops - Decent people.

Hope and Union - had to wait 45 minutes for a parmo amidst shrieking from dosbods. 

8pm snooker

This time of the year is shit for those who like a pub as it should be. Bring on January 

Bit like the supermarkets, during December I avoid on Fridays and weekends. Safe again January 2nd. 

Edited by spunko

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1 minute ago, spunko said:

Bit like the supermarkets, during December I avoid on Fridays and weekends. Safe again January 2nd. 

My mate has put her back out so i did my good samaritan act and took her shopping to Sainsbury’s today. I wouldn’t normally venture there on a Friday. 
 

anyhow, it was rammed, completely rammed with old folk. (Swissy would not have enjoyed it). They were bloody agressive and nasty with their trollies. I wouldn’t normally notice it but my mate has real mobility issues with her back at the moment. 
 

you could see the look on their faces “im old, you will get out of my way!!!  If not, i will mow you down with my trolley “. Horrendous. 

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The xmas jumper thinh, like parmos, is a very boro area thing.

You get several large groups hutying whitby and yawk, typically some shit sunday league team or work group, all pile in, get pissed, act like cunt - but its ok as theyve got xmas jumpers on.

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6 minutes ago, spygirl said:

The xmas jumper thinh, like parmos, is a very boro area thing.

You get several large groups hutying whitby and yawk, typically some shit sunday league team or work group, all pile in, get pissed, act like cunt - but its ok as theyve got xmas jumpers on.

Christmas twats are everywhere unfortunately. 

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8 minutes ago, One percent said:

My mate has put her back out so i did my good samaritan act and took her shopping to Sainsbury’s today. I wouldn’t normally venture there on a Friday. 
 

anyhow, it was rammed, completely rammed with old folk. (Swissy would not have enjoyed it). They were bloody agressive and nasty with their trollies. I wouldn’t normally notice it but my mate has real mobility issues with her back at the moment. 
 

you could see the look on their faces “im old, you will get out of my way!!!  If not, i will mow you down with my trolley “. Horrendous. 

I have learned never to go to Morrisons between 10am and 1pm on a Friday as its full of the old bastards who have had all week to drag themselves out.

After 1pm it is full of quite palatable women and normal everyday folks till after 3pm when mayhem once more resumes when the women with kids appear.

Sweet spot 1pm-3pm.

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34 minutes ago, Chewing Grass said:

I have learned never to go to Morrisons between 10am and 1pm on a Friday as its full of the old bastards who have had all week to drag themselves out.

After 1pm it is full of quite palatable women and normal everyday folks till after 3pm when mayhem once more resumes when the women with kids appear.

Sweet spot 1pm-3pm.

What time do the palatable blokes turn up?  Asking for a friend. :)

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5 minutes ago, Chewing Grass said:

1pm to 3pm, which is why I'm there.

Have my favourite checkout ladies as well, no robots for me.

Noted. Ta. :);)

mind, shouldn't all the best blokes be at work at that time?  I dont want an unemployable fuckwit. 
 

Just now, JoeDavola said:

Fixed for you.

Joe!! I can hardly peg some bloke in the veg ilse of Sainsbury’s. o.O

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7 minutes ago, One percent said:

mind, shouldn't all the best blokes be at work at that time?

The hard workers have got up early Mon-Thu so only need to work Fri mornings to get their hours in.

Mind you, now I'm getting on a bit, when Cuntby and Momentum get in I may well sack Friday morning off all-together as uneconomical and not in the spirit of Corbynomics.

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1 minute ago, Chewing Grass said:

The hard workers have got up early Mon-Thu so only need to work Fri mornings to get their hours in.

Mind you, now I'm getting on a bit, when Cuntby and Momentum get in I may well sack Friday morning off all-together as uneconomical and not in the spirit of Corbynomics.

I worked out long ago that working five days a week wasn't worth the candle. Took me into the higher tax bracket. What with that, pension contributions an cost f getting to work, just not worth it. 

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3 hours ago, One percent said:

Just dont go there. o.O

 

well, unless you have straps. :)

If only it had been the fruit isle instead you could have sold your fruit strapping idea for £115k..  then spent the money on toy boys :)

 

A banana duct-taped to a wall has sold for $120,000 (£91,550) at one of North America's most prestigious art shows, with another version of the artwork expected to sell for $150,000 (£114,460).

The prized installation, by Italian artist Maurizio Cattelan, was unveiled at the Art Basel Miami Beach on Wednesday by the Parisian contemporary art gallery Perrotin.

May I present,  the £115k strap-on banana exhibit:

image.jpeg.65cbf82c4d95656fe4b98631dbbcbdb1.jpeg

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10 hours ago, Chewing Grass said:

I have learned never to go to Morrisons between 10am and 1pm on a Friday as its full of the old bastards who have had all week to drag themselves out.

That would have been my dad and late mum! I think my dad still goes there on a Friday morning, if not the chaotic Aldi. 

I used to work there on the checkouts 8 years ago and I didn't mind Friday mornings. However the atmosphere there started to change after 4pm on a Friday afternoon when most people left work and purchased alcohol to self medicate after a week of work where they didn't want to be. Saturday Afternoons weren't no bad so long as there wasn't a football match on. This supermarket was right next to Carrow Road. 

As for pubs, probably best to avoid 'Nasty Friday' where you get a bunch of reprobates who can't handle their drink. What is it with Fridays? 

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11 hours ago, Stuey said:

Golden Smog - Christmas jumper twats playing some sort of card which required 'when red Indians first saw a white person they said...'. Tried to ignore the smell from real ale twats. 

 

go back, accuse them of being racist, you are probably 1/1024th Native American and the term Red Indian is offensive to you, should be worth a few 1/1024ths of a payout in compo so perhaps a free pint?

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10 hours ago, One percent said:

Noted. Ta. :);)

mind, shouldn't all the best blokes be at work at that time?  I dont want an unemployable fuckwit. 
 

Joe!! I can hardly peg some bloke in the veg ilse of Sainsbury’s. o.O

Sainsbury's? Oooh get you all la di dah.

You'll never find what you're looking for in there, it's all middle aged blokes called Dennis or Peter getting dragged round by their middle-class wives.

Best cross-section is Morrison's. For Milf can't beat Aldi.

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8 hours ago, spunko said:

About 40 years ago. 

You joke but when I go into a Waitrose its now full of the doddery OAPS that stopped me going into MnS.

The free coffee attracted the freeloading cunts like flies. Now they'll have to get rid of the,.

 

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