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Funny listings


sarahbell

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stop_the_craziness
On 18/09/2020 at 12:17, UmBongo said:

Perhaps a photo of the house without the plants in the way might be a good idea? xD

3 bedder west Norwich £200k

11671_0054_HRT005408202_IMG_15_0000_max_

I think the trees and shrubs are the best feature.  They help to cover up that stupid tiny ugly garage that's been grafted on to the front of the house.

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On 18/09/2020 at 12:17, UmBongo said:

Perhaps a photo of the house without the plants in the way might be a good idea? xD

3 bedder west Norwich £200k

11671_0054_HRT005408202_IMG_15_0000_max_

 

My house had a massive Buddleia blocking the best part of the view out of the main picture window.

I asked the seller why they hadn't taken it down and they said they liked the butterflies.

When I had a better look I could see that it was hiding where some of the railings had entirely rusted through but this was fairly obvious anyway when I looked at others which had been wrapped in black insulation type to hide the rust.

In that case I had decided to replace them anyway so no bother but he'd clearly been letting that grow over the years, with consequent loss of view, to hide the state of the railings yet a cursory inspection was always going to reveal that.

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On 21/09/2020 at 00:57, Frank Hovis said:

 

My house had a massive Buddleia blocking the best part of the view out of the main picture window.

I asked the seller why they hadn't taken it down and they said they liked the butterflies.

When I had a better look I could see that it was hiding where some of the railings had entirely rusted through but this was fairly obvious anyway when I looked at others which had been wrapped in black insulation type to hide the rust.

In that case I had decided to replace them anyway so no bother but he'd clearly been letting that grow over the years, with consequent loss of view, to hide the state of the railings yet a cursory inspection was always going to reveal that.

I had a mate in norfolk once that sold a house that had an internal wall with a crack in it you could put your fist in.  He moved a very very heavy oak wardrobe in front of it and the surveyor missed it.

This was a while ago before declarations etc, and as far as I know he never had any comeback for it>>!

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  • 6 months later...

From ToS

Scabbys funniest listing:

https://www.examinerlive.co.uk/news/property/gallery/yorkshire-home-sale-25m-fit-18461722

I can describe how shit a location that house is in.

And how its at least £2.3m overpriced.

 

It has been joined by a few of others:

https://www.onthemarket.com/details/9917518/?utm_source=home_co_uk&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=home_feed

Not. A. Fucking. Chance.

 

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Frank Hovis
2 hours ago, spygirl said:

From ToS

Scabbys funniest listing:

https://www.examinerlive.co.uk/news/property/gallery/yorkshire-home-sale-25m-fit-18461722

I can describe how shit a location that house is in.

And how its at least £2.3m overpriced.

 

It has been joined by a few of others:

https://www.onthemarket.com/details/9917518/?utm_source=home_co_uk&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=home_feed

Not. A. Fucking. Chance.

 

 

Yet I said that about listings in Cornwall six months ago.

And they've all sold.

The housing market has gone bonkers.  The young couple I know looking for a nice small coastal house for £210k would have struggled last year.

Now they have zero chance as that's only going to get them flats and park homes.

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2 hours ago, Frank Hovis said:

 

Yet I said that about listings in Cornwall six months ago.

And they've all sold.

The housing market has gone bonkers.  The young couple I know looking for a nice small coastal house for £210k would have struggled last year.

Now they have zero chance as that's only going to get them flats and park homes.

Scabby isnt Cornwall.

London money does not aspire to Scabby, thank God.

 

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31 minutes ago, Frank Hovis said:

"This property has been removed by the agent" - you'll have to tell us.

Apols. It was just a weird hoarders paradise with lots of dolls and doll pictures and wreaths and flags and ornaments and broken kitchens and piled clothes and and and .....

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  • 5 months later...
  • 4 weeks later...

Not a funny listing but more an unusual one.

37799_2792_IMG_24_0001.jpeg

This has seven bedrooms and 2.6 acres despite being right in the middle of Helston; it's their equivalent of Sion House and is up for £1.5m.

It even has a rifle range!

https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/81607790#/?channel=RES_BUY

 

What's unusual is that it's part of the Flora Day celebrations; I've had a picnic on the lawn on Flora Day with friends from Helston thinking it was a council or National Trust building given that the dancers went through the garden and so many people picnicked there on the day.

There are even houses in Helston where the dancers go right through a house from back door to front and have for hundreds of years.

I've not heard of anyone ever objecting to people dancing through their house as they know this when they buy it and are proud that it has this history of being part of the dance; for which the whole town stops and the roads are closed. I've been two or three times and it is a great event.

Does this kind of traditional public access to gardens and houses happen anywhere else? 

I'm not looking to buy it btw.

 

 

 

 

The property is well known in Helston for the part it traditionally plays in the Flora Day celebrations.

The seller says: "It is most famous for the part it plays in the ancient, or midday dance when the participants, gentlemen in morning suits and top hats and ladies in long dresses and garden party hats, dance through the gardens and take a well earned rest on the lower lawn.

"The sound of champagne corks popping reverberates around this gorgeous garden before the dancers then continue on their way, exiting through the house to resume their procession around the town.

"Through this wonderful association the property forms part of the tradition and folklore of Helston."

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With a crooked smile
5 hours ago, Frank Hovis said:

Does this kind of traditional public access to gardens and houses happen anywhere else? 

This place is near me and is rented to private tenants for about 35k per year. It's on a private island, the milk man canoes the milk in. They have to let the public in for 5 days a year but used the covid excuse not to open this year. 

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2426630/amp/40-000-year-live-house-Wordsworth-hated-Isolated-listed-home-Lake-District-island-rent-National-Trust.html

I've lived elsewhere and know a rural cottage that allowed Morris dancers and hangers on the bless the apple tree each year before the village retired to the local pub. 

images (4).jpeg

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20 minutes ago, With a crooked smile said:

This place is near me and is rented to private tenants for about 35k per year. It's on a private island, the milk man canoes the milk in. They have to let the public in for 5 days a year but used the covid excuse not to open this year. 

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2426630/amp/40-000-year-live-house-Wordsworth-hated-Isolated-listed-home-Lake-District-island-rent-National-Trust.html

I've lived elsewhere and know a rural cottage that allowed Morris dancers and hangers on the bless the apple tree each year before the village retired to the local pub. 

images (4).jpeg

 

@Wight Flight was quoting £30k a year rent on decent sized houses on the IoW so that looks an absolute bargain.

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With a crooked smile
24 minutes ago, Frank Hovis said:

that looks an absolute bargain.

My error - it was 40k rent in 2013. I bet the heating costs are astronomical. 

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35 minutes ago, Frank Hovis said:

 

@Wight Flight was quoting £30k a year rent on decent sized houses on the IoW so that looks an absolute bargain.

I was paying £38k per year just three years ago.

I may well be doing so again three years hence.

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2 minutes ago, Wight Flight said:

I was paying £38k per year just three years ago.

I may well be doing so again three years hence.

Pisser.

Though many are in the same boat.

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With a crooked smile
13 minutes ago, Wight Flight said:

I was paying £38k per year just three years ago.

I may well be doing so again three years hence.

Surely you could get a mortgage for half that on something like this? Dont know the area but property looks fine

https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/113903813

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7 minutes ago, With a crooked smile said:

Surely you could get a mortgage for half that on something like this? Dont know the area but property looks fine

https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/113903813

Oddly enough I nearly rented the one next door last year. It was on for £1,100 but got pulled from the market the day I was meant to view.

Nice house though. On a very main road, but good for local amenities and transport.

But assuming you had a 10% deposit, you would need to have a provable income of £80k plus to buy it. It would currently rent for about £1,600, meaning you only need to earn £48k to rent it. The landlord can always outbid a renter by leveraging up the renter's payments.

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31 minutes ago, Frank Hovis said:

Pisser.

Though many are in the same boat.

Anecdotal but a lot on the Facebook groups I follow are buying cheap caravans as their rentals are being sold.

There is a movement trying to get traction to buy a plot of land where they can all park their vans.

They need to take a leaf out of our tarmac laying friends' book.

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