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DOSBODS Top Tips Thread

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Never buy anything new if you can buy it secondhand,

Never buy anything secondhand if you can borrow it,

Never borrow anything you don't need.

 

Edited by Hopeful

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When shaving in the mirror, to avoid it steaming up, wipe a small dab of shaving foam/gel over an area of the mirror before you start. It stops it steaming over so quick.

Edited by Sgt Hartman

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7 minutes ago, Sgt Hartman said:

When shaving in the mirror, to avoid it steaming up, wipe a small dab of shaving foam/gel over an area of the mirror before you start. It stops it steaming over so quick.

 

Top tip: Save foam and learn how to shave without needing a mirror.

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Just now, Hopeful said:

 

Top tip: Save foam and learn how to shave without needing a mirror.

It's not my fault I've got such a manly, chiselled chin that I need a mirror to shave the angles properly.

 

derek-zoolander-thumb.jpg

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2 hours ago, Frank Hovis said:

The thread is open for @MrPin; published Top Tipper of Viz fame.

Yes Frank. I did it for a bet. I thought Viz wisdom was made up, and they wouldn't publish mine. My fellow bettee, also had one printed

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Before handing a note to the cashier remember the last three digits. I have been short-changed a few times when handing over a £20 note. It's like being a magician when they check and see the three digits match. Even then I have had some morons look at me as if I'm scamming them!

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Tin-foil hatters: Avoid potential ridicule from your friends and family by making many varied and practical tin-foil items that protect areas other than the skull from imaginary and delusional threats...

 

XYY

Edited by The XYY Man

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31 minutes ago, OurDayWillCome said:

Before handing a note to the cashier remember the last three digits. I have been short-changed a few times when handing over a £20 note. It's like being a magician when they check and see the three digits match. Even then I have had some morons look at me as if I'm scamming them!

write your name on them

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1 hour ago, OurDayWillCome said:

Before handing a note to the cashier remember the last three digits. I have been short-changed a few times when handing over a £20 note. It's like being a magician when they check and see the three digits match. Even then I have had some morons look at me as if I'm scamming them!

If I get notes in my change I always make a big show of holding them up to the light etc. If the cashier has one of those pens I sometimes ask to borrow it.

Mind, I am a right tosser.

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Morbidity obese people, always ostentatiously eat a salad for lunch in the staff break room to make sure that no-one thinks you're living off a diet of Gregg's pies and utterly bitterly eaten from the tub.

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5 hours ago, The XYY Man said:

Ladies - avoid the embarrassment and procrastination of getting on "farting terms" with your new boyfriend by simply shitting his bed on the first date...

 

XYY

Women: leave for work earlier in the morning. That way, men can be spared the spectacle of watching you running for a train.

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9 hours ago, eight said:

If I get notes in my change I always make a big show of holding them up to the light etc. If the cashier has one of those pens I sometimes ask to borrow it.

Mind, I am a right tosser.

Good idea - I might start carrying my own pen rather than having to ask 😁

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