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Chewing Grass

Christmas Retail Sales - More BBC Bollocks

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On the Bollocks Broadcasting Companies News this evening the said retail sales were down at Christmas but offset by a shift of purchasing to November because of Black Friday.

This is Bollocks as their own graph shows and is just for the consumption of those who cannot read or think.

_99660067_chart-retail_sales_01_18-nc.pn

Overall Xmas sales down which is hardly surprising as most of the natives are having to spend less and the bulk of immigrants do not celebrate it.

Accordingly Xmas sales will be going down permanently year on year.

Xmas as traditionally known since the 1960s is no more.

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2 minutes ago, Chewing Grass said:

On the Bollocks Broadcasting Companies News this evening the said retail sales were down at Christmas but offset by a shift of purchasing to November because of Black Friday.

This is Bollocks as their own graph shows and is just for the consumption of those who cannot read or think.

_99660067_chart-retail_sales_01_18-nc.pn

Overall Xmas sales down which is hardly surprising as most of the natives are having to spend less and the bulk of immigrants do not celebrate it.

Accordingly Xmas sales will be going down permanently year on year.

Xmas as traditionally known since the 1960s is no more.

On the plus side, sales of Eid and Ramadan cards are going up, and flights to Mecca are a good return on investment. 

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Look at the retailer share price and dividends.  Everything else is fluff.

I expect a few retailers to go bankrupt around month end.

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2 hours ago, Chewing Grass said:

On the Bollocks Broadcasting Companies News this evening the said retail sales were down at Christmas but offset by a shift of purchasing to November because of Black Friday.

This is Bollocks as their own graph shows and is just for the consumption of those who cannot read or think.

_99660067_chart-retail_sales_01_18-nc.pn

Overall Xmas sales down which is hardly surprising as most of the natives are having to spend less and the bulk of immigrants do not celebrate it.

Accordingly Xmas sales will be going down permanently year on year.

Xmas as traditionally known since the 1960s is no more.

What a fantastic informative graph. 1 thingy was sold in November. Which is wonderful. But then 1.5 bad thingies happened in December. I feel sad now.

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12 minutes ago, Happy Renting said:

What a fantastic informative graph. 1 thingy was sold in November. Which is wonderful. But then 1.5 bad thingies happened in December. I feel sad now.

I think the red bars are people returning stuff to the shop that they bought in the green/blue bars.  At year end you subtract one from the other and that gives how much stock the charity shop gets.

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3 minutes ago, dgul said:

I think the red bars are people returning stuff to the shop that they bought in the green/blue bars.  At year end you subtract one from the other and that gives how much stock the charity shop gets.

+6.1, - 4.6

Charity surplus 1.5

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2 minutes ago, dgul said:

I think the red bars are people returning stuff to the shop that they bought in the green/blue bars.  At year end you subtract one from the other and that gives how much stock the charity shop gets.

I think 1.5% fewer thingies were sold in December than at some other undisclosed time. Or 1.5% less thingy, Depending on what the thingy or thingies is/are.

Thankfully we have a graph to help us understand.

Anyway it's due to Brexit and we should all be sad.

 

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Tbh, how much more consumer tat can we stuff into our houses? As a society I think there are better things to spend money on than kitchens gadgets that aren't used and yet another "hilarious" Christmas jumper.

Then don't get me started on mugs. How long does a mug last? A couple of decades until you accidentally break it? Why do so many gift shops base their entire business around selling mugs and cups? 

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1 minute ago, Great Guy said:

Tbh, how much more consumer tat can we stuff into our houses? As a society I think there are better things to spend money on than kitchens gadgets that aren't used and yet another "hilarious" Christmas jumper.

Then don't get me started on mugs. How long does a mug last? A couple of decades until you accidentally break it? Why do so many gift shops base their entire business around selling mugs and cups? 

Smaller housing - less room for tat, more expensive housing, less money to spend on tat (and much else for that matter).

It's only going to end one way.....

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2 minutes ago, Great Guy said:

Tbh, how much more consumer tat can we stuff into our houses? As a society I think there are better things to spend money on than kitchens gadgets that aren't used and yet another "hilarious" Christmas jumper.

Then don't get me started on mugs. How long does a mug last? A couple of decades until you accidentally break it? Why do so many gift shops base their entire business around selling mugs and cups? 

I once told my wife 'look, you can't have too many mugs'.

I think she interpreted this as 'you can't have too many mugs!'

Oh, the magic of the English language.

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9 minutes ago, Frank Hovis said:

Quite.  I must have twenty mugs of which I have bought seven.  They never break, I will never buy another one.  yet inevitably I will "acquire" more.

It's the same with pens. I've started a new job and there must be 30 pens in the desk drawer. How long will a pen last when most writing is done with a keyboard? 6 months each? I've got enough pens to last me for the rest of my life... Yet people still give me pens as gifts....

In all honesty, I think consumer stuff should have a higher VAT rate.

 

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3 minutes ago, Great Guy said:

It's the same with pens. I've started a new job and there must be 30 pens in the desk drawer. How long will a pen last when most writing is done with a keyboard? 6 months each? I've got enough pens to last me for the rest of my life... Yet people still give me pens as gifts....

In all honesty, I think consumer stuff should have a higher VAT rate.

 

Ah.  Pens are different.  They migrate around the place.  You have to 'feed' pens into the system so that the natural equilibrium in the distribution of pens can be built up. 

You also have to move them from equilibrium 'sinks' -- it sounds like your desk draw is one of them.   Just take the 30 pens and then randomly distribute them about the place -- they'll then naturally move to their equilibrium position.

Edited by dgul

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27 minutes ago, Great Guy said:

Tbh, how much more consumer tat can we stuff into our houses? As a society I think there are better things to spend money on than kitchens gadgets that aren't used and yet another "hilarious" Christmas jumper.

Then don't get me started on mugs. How long does a mug last? A couple of decades until you accidentally break it? Why do so many gift shops base their entire business around selling mugs and cups? 

It depends how clean it is.

I was in a workplace once where the director had a thing about the cleanliness of the staff mugs, and they had to be spotless.

They never were, always tea or coffee-stained.

There were numerous edicts sent out about the fact they should be spotless.

They still never were.

Then one day we came in to work and there was a mountain of small pieces of white china in the middle of the canteen

Most of us laughed.

Except one employee who walked to the maintenance yard, picked up a sledgehammer and wreaked havoc in the building, and then walked out.

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1 minute ago, Hopeful said:

I was in a workplace once where the director had a thing about the cleanliness of the staff mugs, and they had to be spotless.

That sounds like an OCD compulsion thing...

My line manager used to have his own mug. That's maybe not a brilliant idea when you're a bit of a dick that stabs people in the back....

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2 minutes ago, Great Guy said:

That sounds like an OCD compulsion thing...

My line manager used to have his own mug. That's maybe not a brilliant idea when you're a bit of a dick that stabs people in the back....

Imagine a workplace that resembled the dormitory in Full Metal Jacket

All of us who lived through it have incredible stories we can tell and still do relate some 30 years on.

Edited by Hopeful

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2 minutes ago, Hopeful said:

Imagine a workplace that resembled the dormitory in Full Metal Jacket

My mate worked on an oil rig. I heard a popular joke was to put superglue onto a seat just before someone sat down...

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1 minute ago, Great Guy said:

My mate worked on an oil rig. I heard a popular joke was to put superglue onto a seat just before someone sat down...

I can't say too much, but I'm very lucky to be alive.

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31 minutes ago, Frank Hovis said:

Good-job-clap-clap-clap-GIF.gif

 

Quite.  I must have twenty mugs of which I have bought seven.  They never break, I will never buy another one.  yet inevitably I will "acquire" more.

Why must people fill their houses with things?  Stop buying tat!  Just don't. However cheap it is you don't really want it or need it.  Go pick a stone up out of a field and put in your drawer because that has as much use as your purchased tat.

Indeed!

At least these days relatives don’t buy me stuff that I don’t want. I don’t think they’ve changed because for now they still buy loads of tat for themselves. They just think I’m mean and miserablxD

In my home if something has no use it’s not kept or bought.

Admittedly I do have about a dozen decorative items that have no use and enough clothes and footwear to see me out. I do wear all the clothes and footwear though. If something hasn’t been used for a year it’s ousted!

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