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The make us laugh or fuck off thread


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8 hours ago, whocares said:

The clip cut Jeremy off, so now we will never know the correct answer??

To be fair to the contestant, the first two Jeremy reads out are quite plausible names for groups of homosexuals and sound like things that have been used in the past. It's only as the list goes on that it becomes much less likely that this will be the answer.

Apparently the correct answer is "Regiments in the British Army" :)

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3 minutes ago, DTMark said:

To be fair to the contestant, the first two Jeremy reads out are quite plausible names for groups of homosexuals and sound like things that have been used in the past. It's only as the list goes on that it becomes much less likely that this will be the answer.

Apparently the correct answer is "Regiments in the British Army" :)

Cheers. It usually pays to have a guess but Jezza is scary when he thinks the answer is too stupid! 😂

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46 minutes ago, whocares said:

Cheers. It usually pays to have a guess but Jezza is scary when he thinks the answer is too stupid! 😂

Incredible change in his appearance compared to now. I had forgotten just how long he has been doing the show.

I always liked that one where one of the students called him "mate" and Paxo didn't quite know what to say.

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I’m sure we have had this but bloody funny

There is nothing worse than a Doctor's Receptionist who insists you tell her what is wrong with you in a room full of other patients. 

I know most of us have experienced this, and I love the way this guy handled it. 

A 65-year-old man walked into a crowded waiting room and approached the desk. 

The Receptionist said, 'Yes sir, what are you seeing the Doctor for today?' 

'There's something wrong with my dick', he replied. 

The receptionist became irritated and said, 'You shouldn't come into a crowded waiting room and say things like that. ' 

'Why not, you asked me what was wrong and I told you,' he said.

The Receptionist replied; 'Now you've caused some embarrassment in this room full of people. You should have said there is something wrong with your ear or something and discussed the problem further with the Doctor in private.' 

The man replied, 'You shouldn't ask people questions in a roomful of strangers, if the answer could embarrass anyone. The man walked out, waited several minutes, and then re-entered.

The Receptionist smiled smugly and asked, 'Yes??' 

'There's something wrong with my ear,' he stated.

The Receptionist nodded approvingly and smiled, knowing he had taken her advice.. 'And what is wrong with your ear, Sir?' 

'I can't piss out of it,' he replied. 

The waiting room erupted in laughter... 

Mess with seniors, and you're going to lose....(yep, sure are) 😉 

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30 minutes ago, One percent said:

I’m sure we have had this but bloody funny

There is nothing worse than a Doctor's Receptionist who insists you tell her what is wrong with you in a room full of other patients. 

I know most of us have experienced this, and I love the way this guy handled it. 

A 65-year-old man walked into a crowded waiting room and approached the desk. 

The Receptionist said, 'Yes sir, what are you seeing the Doctor for today?' 

'There's something wrong with my dick', he replied. 

The receptionist became irritated and said, 'You shouldn't come into a crowded waiting room and say things like that. ' 

'Why not, you asked me what was wrong and I told you,' he said.

The Receptionist replied; 'Now you've caused some embarrassment in this room full of people. You should have said there is something wrong with your ear or something and discussed the problem further with the Doctor in private.' 

The man replied, 'You shouldn't ask people questions in a roomful of strangers, if the answer could embarrass anyone. The man walked out, waited several minutes, and then re-entered.

The Receptionist smiled smugly and asked, 'Yes??' 

'There's something wrong with my ear,' he stated.

The Receptionist nodded approvingly and smiled, knowing he had taken her advice.. 'And what is wrong with your ear, Sir?' 

'I can't piss out of it,' he replied. 

The waiting room erupted in laughter... 

Mess with seniors, and you're going to lose....(yep, sure are) 😉 

Years ago I went to draw a fair few thousand quid in cash out of the bank and when the teller insisted I tell them what it was for due to "regulations", took great pleasure in announcing very loudly so the whole queue could hear "what do I want it for? I want it for high class call girls and cocaine, that's what I want it for. Can I have my money now please?"

Two oldest dears in the queue were the ones clearly trying not to piss themselves the most.

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1 minute ago, MrLibertyRedux said:

Years ago I went to draw a fair few thousand quid in cash out of the bank and when the teller insisted I tell them what it was for due to "regulations", took great pleasure in announcing very loudly so the whole queue could hear "what do I want it for? I want it for high class call girls and cocaine, that's what I want it for. Can I have my money now please?"

Two oldest dears in the queue were the ones clearly trying not to piss themselves the most.

Superbly played that man 👍

whenever the GP receptionist asks me what’s wrong, my go to reply is, if i knew that, I wouldn’t need to see the GP.  o.O

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2 hours ago, MrLibertyRedux said:

Years ago I went to draw a fair few thousand quid in cash out of the bank and when the teller insisted I tell them what it was for due to "regulations", took great pleasure in announcing very loudly so the whole queue could hear "what do I want it for? I want it for high class call girls and cocaine, that's what I want it for. Can I have my money now please?"

Two oldest dears in the queue were the ones clearly trying not to piss themselves the most.

Not your money.  You have no money in the bank.

The Bank owes you a debt.  Whether they choose to pay you or not, is up to them.

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6 minutes ago, wherebee said:

Not your money.  You have no money in the bank.

The Bank owes you a debt.  Whether they choose to pay you or not, is up to them.

😬 Don't say that 

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