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Frank Hovis

Do you feel like a "grown up"?

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I'm watching Withnail and I, again, and it's amazing how pathetic Withnail & I, two blokes aged about thirty, are at dealing with the basics of life.

They go to a country cottage and are basically just camping out until Uncle Monty arrives and with some effort and thought turns a bleak set of four walls into a comfortable and cosy home.

Now, ignoring all the other things about the characters, are you able to create home, comfort, and hot meals from very little?  Or would you shiver under a blanket eating cold baked beans and hoping that it gets sorted for you, rather than putting some bloody effort in and sorting it out for yourself, as most of us would have done when students?

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I reckon I could be totally self sufficient,

But I don't seem to do well among today's world of adults

and I still think I'm a young 20 when I see an attractive young woman walk past

So, I'm not sure that I'm a 'grown up'

 

Edited by Hopeful

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6 minutes ago, Frank Hovis said:

I'm watching Withnail and I, again, and it's amazing how pathetic Withnail & I, two blokes aged about thirty, are at dealing with the basics of life.

They go to a country cottage and are basically just camping out until Uncle Monty arrives and with some effort and thought turns a bleak set of four walls into a comfortable and cosy home.

Now, ignoring all the other things about the characters, are you able to create home, comfort, and hot meals from very little?  Or would you shiver under a blanket eating cold baked beans and hoping that it gets sorted for you, rather than putting some bloody effort in and sorting it out for yourself, as most of us would have done when students?

I think we have discussed this film before frank. Tedious at best. 

To answer your question, on one level yes. I am quite practical and careful with money. Do I feel different to how I felt at 21, no.  

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Yep I'm a grown up ie I take my responsibilities very seriously and I'm practically very able.

I can also be childlike (not childish!) still be be silly, not take myself too seriously and laugh when JFK farts on the cat :D

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I would estimate that I’m grown up having provided for myself plus a son and daughter for almost 20 years. Self reliant because I’ve had to be. Life could be better or it could be worse. My life is generally ok though.

Luckily I was born at the right time so have a paid up house and no debt. I’m thrifty. That came about having to be that way due to unexpected single parenthood but now I enjoy thriftiness.

I particularly enjoy nabbing a cheap thing of use that someone else has paid full whack for then discarded!

I worry about my son more than my daughter. She left home six years ago and is extremely independent whereas my son still lives at home (paying reasonable dig money). He earns decent money in the building trade but that game isn’t for the long term.

I’m never complacent though. Life can, through throwing curve balls unexpectedly, might one day may me think I’m not as grown up as I thought I was!

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1 minute ago, Economic Exile said:

I would estimate that I’m grown up having provided for myself plus a son and daughter for almost 20 years. Self reliant because I’ve had to be. Life could be better or it could be worse. My life is generally ok though.

Luckily I was born at the right time so have a paid up house and no debt. I’m thrifty. That came about having to be that way due to unexpected single parenthood but now I enjoy thriftiness.

I particularly enjoy nabbing a cheap thing of use that someone else has paid full whack for then discarded!

I worry about my son more than my daughter. She left home six years ago and is extremely independent whereas my son still lives at home (paying reasonable dig money). He earns decent money in the building trade but that game isn’t for the long term.

I’m never complacent though. Life can, through throwing curve balls unexpectedly, might one day may me think I’m not as grown up as I thought I was!

Not convinced by that EE. If he learns some skills he will be very much be in demand as a self employed bod. 

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Old Dr J.P. asked 'how can you expect to be a leader, or even be listened to, when you aren't even in control of your own life?' (I paraphrase). It's been a bit of a wake-up call for me, because I lead a life of chaos,  lurching from one crisis to the next, running to meetings, hunting for clothes, eating cold food from a tin 'cos its quicker and cheaper, and shivering to keep warm. Most of this is because I'm an arch procrastinator, which must be a mental thing, but then it's a mental thing with Withnail & him.

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Just asked the other half "do you feel grown up?" He replied "not really"

He's currently teasing the cat with a talking farting Dave Minion.

Our cat being an ex feral and hard as nails doesn't give a ****

 

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3 minutes ago, One percent said:

Not convinced by that EE. If he learns some skills he will be very much be in demand as a self employed bod. 

It’s the pension age raises that concern me. One of his coworkers slightly younger than me, nearing sixty, is physically knackered.

They didn’t work much at all in December and early January due to unsuitable weather conditions so no work done no pay.

My son is an arse because he’s a labourer .....not a tradesman. He had opportunities. Also opportunities to get a driving licence paid for him. He didn’t take it up.

I really laughed out loud in his face one day when I enquired what he would do in life on his own. His response...,that won’t happen. That’s when I really laughed. My response....oh, so you think I’m immortal and will always be here! xD

I’m also concerned about my daughter though. She has picked up bits of work here and there in ecology stuff but is still trying to get at leas5 a year or so contract.

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2 minutes ago, Economic Exile said:

It’s the pension age raises that concern me. One of his coworkers slightly younger than me, nearing sixty, is physically knackered.

They didn’t work much at all in December and early January due to unsuitable weather conditions so no work done no pay.

My son is an arse because he’s a labourer .....not a tradesman. He had opportunities. Also opportunities to get a driving licence paid for him. He didn’t take it up.

I really laughed out loud in his face one day when I enquired what he would do in life on his own. His response...,that won’t happen. That’s when I really laughed. My response....oh, so you think I’m immortal and will always be here! xD

I’m also concerned about my daughter though. She has picked up bits of work here and there in ecology stuff but is still trying to get at leas5 a year or so contract.

We are all screwed pension wise EE. I get what you are saying re not being able to do manual work past a certain age. He will though find his place. He is clearly a worker. He will realise that he needs to get a trade, or might just pick it up along the way. 

If he has skills and is trustworthy, then people will be falling over themselves to get him to do stuff. 

Dont know about where you are but I can’t get a decent plasterer for love nor money. 

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5 minutes ago, One percent said:

We are all screwed pension wise EE. I get what you are saying re not being able to do manual work past a certain age. He will though find his place. He is clearly a worker. He will realise that he needs to get a trade, or might just pick it up along the way. 

If he has skills and is trustworthy, then people will be falling over themselves to get him to do stuff. 

Dont know about where you are but I can’t get a decent plasterer for love nor money. 

He’s labouring for a couple builders. They’re in demand at the moment because lots of EE bods have gone home. Good news for people like my son etc. They are in the position of asking for more to move to a different house building site.

Plenty plasterers here...at a price!

Edited by Economic Exile

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Hehe, good question.

I quite often look in the mirror and wonder 'now, just how the fuck did I get here?'

I have about 12 years I can't account for. Not because I was on the lash, but because at some point time seemed to speed up and I just lost track of it. My hair left the building during this era.

In terms of self-sufficiency, no problem. I can cook to a good standard, can grow stuff to cook, can keep a good house and am pretty confident if you dumped me outdoors somewhere and told me to not die, I'd be fine.

 

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7 minutes ago, Sgt Hartman said:

Hehe, good question.

I quite often look in the mirror and wonder 'now, just how the fuck did I get here?'

I have about 12 years I can't account for. Not because I was on the lash, but because at some point time seemed to speed up and I just lost track of it. My hair left the building during this era.

In terms of self-sufficiency, no problem. I can cook to a good standard, can grow stuff to cook, can keep a good house and am pretty confident if you dumped me outdoors somewhere and told me to not die, I'd be fine.

 

 

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My eldest son drove me to Argos today in his own car. He's 21 soon and it now seems really strange that for all these years I've been driving him to places, he's now taking me. I'm not sure if that makes me feel grown up, more like old because the last 20 years have gone so fast. I think I blinked and missed it. Conversely I bet it makes him feel grown up at the tender age of 20, taking his little old mum to the shops. 

Edited by Battenberg

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Do I feel like a "grown-up"...?

Do I fuck...!!!

I'm still somewhere between twelve and fifteen inside my head - and in my mind, I am still regularly caught smoking in the bogs, and I never fail to enjoy sticking my fingers up behind the head-master's back after he's just caned me for it.

Growing-up is for cunts...

;)

 

XYY

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2 minutes ago, Battenberg said:

My eldest son drove me to Argos today in his own car. He's 21 soon and it now seems really strange that for all these years I've been driving him to places he's now taking me. I'm not sure if that makes me feel grown up, more like old because the last 20 years have gone so fast. I think I blinked and missed it. Conversely I bet it makes him feel grown up at the tender age of 20, taking his little old mum to the shops. 

I concur. Last year my daughter acquired a car after getting her licence about three years ago.

It was a strange feeling being driven by offspring after ferrying them about for years!

A mixed feeling really....strange wondering about their life but pride that you’ve raised a kid that has the ability to drive you about.

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4 minutes ago, Economic Exile said:

I concur. Last year my daughter acquired a car after getting her licence about three years ago.

It was a strange feeling being driven by offspring after ferrying them about for years!

A mixed feeling really....strange wondering about their life but pride that you’ve raised a kid that has the ability to drive you about.

My parents cut something out of the paper about 49 being the age at which it switches so that you help your parents rather than vice versa and in my case it's entirely true.  I am now on a weekly basis sorting out their computers, TVs, tax returns, moving furniture, checking out the cars they want to buy etc. etc.

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2 minutes ago, Frank Hovis said:

My parents cut something out of the paper about 49 being the age at which it switches so that you help your parents rather than vice versa and in my case it's entirely true.  I am now on a weekly basis sorting out their computers, TVs, tax returns, moving furniture, checking out the cars they want to buy etc. etc.

I read somewhere that you only really grow up when you lose both your parents 

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3 minutes ago, Frank Hovis said:

My parents cut something out of the paper about 49 being the age at which it switches so that you help your parents rather than vice versa and in my case it's entirely true.  I am now on a weekly basis sorting out their computers, TVs, tax returns, moving furniture, checking out the cars they want to buy etc. etc.

I think it’s really nice that you do that for your parents. Top human!

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2 minutes ago, One percent said:

I read somewhere that you only really grow up when you lose both your parents 

There could be some truth in that. I never got on well with either of mine but they did help me and were therefor me sometimes.

When they both died within two months of each other I knew it was all down to me. No one at all to go to!

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1 minute ago, Economic Exile said:

There could be some truth in that. I never got on well with either of mine but they did help me and were therefor me sometimes.

When they both died within two months of each other I knew it was all down to me. No one at all to go to!

That’s the bit. It is weird knowing there is no backstop. Mind, financially, I’ve always stood on my own two feet. I guess it is the emotional stuff. 

Sorry that you lost both of yours within such a short space of time. Must have been hard. 

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1 minute ago, Economic Exile said:

There could be some truth in that. I never got on well with either of mine but they did help me and were therefor me sometimes.

When they both died within two months of each other I knew it was all down to me. No one at all to go to!

Exactly the same for me. Only difference being it was 3 months rather than two. 

Even though we were not close, those three months changed my life massively. 

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