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SNACR

If You Had Access To A Time Machine....

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What would you use it for?

I think I would got back to Roman times to speak to the architects and project engineers of Rome and tell them ‘if you could pull your fucking finger’s out and build this in a day or less, I’d be very grateful, as I’d hear a whole lot less about it’

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Next trip would be to 1914 and the Bristol International Exhibition, and you’ve guessed it, I’II be taking a fucking magic marker with me.

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I'd go back and kill:

Hitler

Marx

Lenin

Stalin

Mao

Mohammed

for starters.

 

I'd then look at how to stop the slave trade cross atlantic before it started.

 

Then I'd have a rest.

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I think I'd just go back maybe a thousand years and use my modern knowledge, if I could avoid getting killed, to get a position of influence and do so much fucking that I'd change the bloodline of Europe forever. If I could have about 50 kids, compounded up over a thousand years I reckon I could be pretty  much related to very single native European. And probably have my descendants on various thrones. 

What else is there to do?

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58 minutes ago, Roger_Mellie said:

I think I'd just go back maybe a thousand years and use my modern knowledge, if I could avoid getting killed, to get a position of influence and do so much fucking that I'd change the bloodline of Europe forever. If I could have about 50 kids, compounded up over a thousand years I reckon I could be pretty  much related to very single native European. And probably have my descendants on various thrones. 

What else is there to do?

will you call yourself the rothschilds ?

 

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1 hour ago, wherebee said:

I'd go back and kill:

Hitler

Marx

Lenin

Stalin

Mao

Mohammed

for starters.

 

I'd then look at how to stop the slave trade cross atlantic before it started.

 

Then I'd have a rest.

why think the british  started the slave trade,the vikeings mane trade was slaves not gold or silver but slaves ,and look upon the white slave trade ,thats my first response to blacks at work who think britain was founded on slavery ,ie barbary pirates,shaka zulu slavery,south america before europeans got there slavery and sarcrifice,slavery has been around since agriculture was invented

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I'd tell the extended family I was going away for a while, use it to get a modest lottery win to pay the bills while I was away, then set it to April 19. 

The Brexit crap over the next 12 months is going to be unbearable.

[And if it's still unbearable then, I'll set it for 2020]

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21 minutes ago, stokiescum said:

why think the british  started the slave trade,the vikeings mane trade was slaves not gold or silver but slaves ,and look upon the white slave trade ,thats my first response to blacks at work who think britain was founded on slavery ,ie barbary pirates,shaka zulu slavery,south america before europeans got there slavery and sarcrifice,slavery has been around since agriculture was invented

because without slaves the USA would be a very different place, probably no civil war, and a great example of a true 21 century civilisation without that.

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33 minutes ago, wherebee said:

because without slaves the USA would be a very different place, probably no civil war, and a great example of a true 21 century civilisation without that.

they were still in the stone age used dogs to drag sleighns no horses no metal work and slaughered each other regualy,they hant even invented the wheel.

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I'd go forward 30 years & download price histories for the world's top 10,000 stocks and all major currency pairs onto some suitable medium and bring it back to the present day.

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Interesting decision.  I think I can generally visualise how most things in Britain appeared though to be a spectator at a big ritual at Stonehenge or Avebury would be great.

I'd say, whilst I'm not generally interested in  Egypt, to see the original Sphinx and find out when it was carved.  The general thought is a lion's head but was the body excavated out at the same time?  Either way it was carved vastly before the Pyramids when Egypt had a wet climate so would have been a pre-agricultural society so the imagery and beliefs may have been very different.

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I’d be sh1t scared of going anywhere..

Back in time more than a couple hundred years and you’d probably be murdered by the first community you bumped into for being an outsider and a godless heretic.

Forward in time..  who knows what you might find.  Nuclear fallout or the plague that wiped out humanity. At the very least I’d want to send a drone first.

 

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Wouldn't mind seeing the dinosaurs, would need to time travel around a bit during that period.

Would like to go back to a world pre-industrial fishing (powered by the ICE) to see the oceans full of life.

Would like to go back to 30th April 1997 to see what I could do

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6 hours ago, stokiescum said:

will you call yourself the rothschilds ?

 

Why not?

It's probably possible to change history so much that Hitler and Stalin wouldn't be born, or definitely wouldn't be the same. So you could could save lives and have loads of fun at the same time. 

See... It would be for completely humanitarian reasons. What's the saying? Think globally, pump locally?

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Posted (edited)

In reality I wouldn’t use it, I would be too concerned about changing things so unpredictably. As a fantasy I would use it to see the megafauna of the various ages of the world. The greatest shows of history, Woodstock, Houdini, Original performances of Shakespeare. I would go back to see the civilisations that built some of the out of place artifacts from (pre)history. I’d steal Helen of Sparta and blame it on the Trojans!

Edited by Hail the Tripod

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Posted (edited)
9 hours ago, Happy Renting said:

Great Exhibition 1851.

VE-Day (I'd pinch an officer's uniform and some condoms).

2012 and buy some Bitcoins.

2037 when the mutant Pandas invade.

Similar but having grown up close to it I've always been fascinated by the Crystal Palace. 

I'd go back to one of the few occasions they turned on the fountains in the park. 

People talk about going to places and feeling the history ooze from the place, I've been to many places, Pyramids at Giza, ancient sites across Europe, Angor Wat, ancient temples across Asia and so on, never had the feeling except for Crystal Palace.  

Seems like a bit of a waste of a time machine, but I've never really bought in to the "kill Hitler" thing, somebody else would fill the void, Hitler didn't do what he did because of who he was*, it happened because of the general condition of the world. What replaced him might have been worse, might even be a case that it's already happened thousands of times and by repeated experiment Hitler et al is the least bloody and violent version of the 20th century we could come up with.

* For clarity, I mean of course he did it because who he was, but it was allowed to happen because of the environment. 

Edited by gilf

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Posted (edited)

I'm with @TheBlueCat on this. The best any of us can do is to look after yourself and immediate family, how far you define your immediate family is your own subjective opinion. 

To kill prominent and influential people might change things for the worse as you have no idea what would happen if the course of history was changed.

In fact to become very wealthy might even change your life and your immediate families in ways that may not be good. My winning the lottery daydreams at times have some unexpected twists when I follow through with some thoughts.

Anyway my time machine project has stalled for lack of funds.

Edited by sleepwello'nights
Hit return before I'd finished

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Posted (edited)
9 hours ago, wherebee said:

 I'd go back and kill:

Hitler

Marx

Lenin

Stalin

Mao

Mohammed

for starters.

 

I'd then look at how to stop the slave trade cross atlantic before it started.

 

Then I'd have a rest.

If you just took out Marx you wouldn't have to bother with the rest, aside from Mohammed.

 

Edited by Carl Fimble
wouldn't not would

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