By Frank Hovis
I genuinely can't remember; certainly not since 2000. I'd be pretty confident that I haven't used one for twenty years. For me they went out about the same time as 5.25" floppy discs.
The NHS however, with its cutting edge systems, is not only still using them but still buying them. I ddn't even know that you could still buy them.
They don't bother to improve because they don't have to - they are just given yet more taxpayers' money to waste.
Their systems are laughably bad.
By Chewing Grass
Apu is going to be killed off in The Simpsons after SJWs have compaigned deemed him a “racist” depiction of an Indian-American. It is suspected that the announcement that Apu Nahasapeemapetilon (the wise-cracking, and sometimes clueless, father of eight children) will be murdered by scriptwriters in a completely random and senseless wacist attack by a deranged Trump supporter with an I.Q. of 78 in week prior to the mid-terms.
By Reck B
Tried to do a poll, but can’t on my phone for some reason.
Anyway, do you have what it takes to be an NHS healthcare professional in 21st century Britain? Let’s see!
A cancer patient is brought into hospital with a family member who provides you with a bag of medication and a list of dosages/times. One of the items on the list says “zoromorph 20mg (x2) 9am and 9pm” the zoromorph is in 10mg tablets. Do you;
a) give the patient 40 mg of zoromorph twice a day
b) give the patient 20 mg of zoromorph twice a day
c) ask for clarification
The patients family notice that the cannula used to administer anti biotics hasn’t been changed for 5 days and leaked slightly during the last dose. Do you;
a) change the cannula immediately
b) say you will tell someone else to change it, risking around half the next dose getting spilled down the patients arm
The patients family have noticed that he is not getting his twice daily blood clot injections as they have not been copied from the list onto his notes. Do you;
a) ignore the family for 2 days and tell them this needs approval from a Dr despite the prescription being written on the box which was brought in on day one
b) quickly seek to resolve the query and administer the medication as prescribed.
the NHS is
a) the envy of the world
b) a gigantic, expensive shambolic fucking mess.
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