By Dave Bloke
It has been a hard last 4 weeks. I hardly have the motivation to write this. I ran out of cash on the 17th December, well in part had to get some Christmas presents but also the cost of living has gone through the fucking roof, taxes and more taxes, bills bills bills, it is never ending. This month I have to be very very careful. I can understand those yellow vest guys out on their roundabouts, things must be desperate.
The current project I'm working on is so fucking complicated. You change one line of code and you have to rewrite Cucumber tests, Mockito Tests, Selenium tests, we've got unit tests up the whazzoo. A shit load of technology to learn and understand. The project seems to integrate a worst of the last decade of bad IT ideas.
Then we've got a load of pot smokin' hippies for IT bosses. They are seriously into shit like pair programming. Well I thought, what do I know, maybe it's a good idea but it seems counter intuitive to put two people onto a job - like hoping that two women can have a baby in 4.5 months. The proof was we had our registration form that needed updating with new rules for GDPR and suchlike. It's a fucking form, a few input fields that need some method behind that runs through the rules. Only some fuckwit had written some "generic rules engine" in the past that doesn't work well with the workflow but has to be used everywhere on every single form. Anyways I started to look at the new rules and fuckwit said I had to "pair programme" then he got pissed off because I wasn't making any progress with his rules engine so I was pulled off the task despite being close to completion. He binned my work and then spent 3 weeks runing up to Christmas finally delivering something then clearing off for a few weeks along with his pair.
Well his code came back from QA as non functional. Muggins had to pick it up and spend a week fixing his crap because his "generic rules engine" was incapable of following the workflow.
Anyway we have some more rules to implement now and they want me to pair despite this clearly not working the last time for this code.
I've also been working on a security issue which someone else had given up on. The actual problem is relatively easy to fix with an Apache rewrite rule but the whole installation code is a nightmare - there is some shell script generic installation process which mixes korn and bourne shells for some reason then you need to run some fucking Ansible steaming pile of shite along with Jenkins just to update a config file.
Honestly I think I'm getting too old for all this.
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